Listen, it's bloomin' cold outside, snow everywhere, wind's howlin', so grab yourself a nice hot cup of bovril, get comfortable, and check out ten things that you might have missed this week from the weird and wonderful world of football...
Wheeler dealer – Appears Rangers boss Steven Gerrard is still struggling with some of the finer complexities of management.
Thanks For Coming. – Benfica Ladies recently won 32-0 against CP Pego with Brazil forward Darlene de Souza Reguera scoring 10 goals, taking her tally for the season to 81 in all competitions. The Eagles' record now reads: Won 14, scored 257, conceded 0. Flying.
Once a Gunner, Always a Gunner – Lukas Podolski tolerates a visit from old boss Jurgen Klinsmann when he was in LA recently. Nice of him.
You Know It's A Good Day When... you score the equaliser AND save a penalty to help your side progress. Take a bow, son!
"Right" Said Fred – "Through the middle" said Rashford. "Just go home, Fred." said everyone else.
Ali G In Da House! – OK, we know it's not nice to kick someone when they're down, but it's Neymar, he deserves it a little bit.
Always Read The Small Print – No, the thing you may have missed here is not Anthony Martial smiling, it's actually the intricate details of his contract. Obviously written in code.
Just Stop It – Union Berlin striker Marcel Hartel just taking the mick right there as he scores a worldie opener against Cologne within 30 seconds.
For All Mankind – Speaking of Mick (see what we've done there?) when Sheffield United striker Billy Sharp celebrated his goal against Norwich by performing the finishing move of WWE wrestler Mick Foley AKA Mankind, he couldn't have possibly realised that it would make it all the way to the wrestling legend himself...
Nice Touch. – Ending on a genuinely touching moment, with the programme for the Arsenal v Cardiff game including missing Argentine striker Emiliano Sala in the match day squad. It could have been his first game for the club.
Stay warm and have a good weekend...
